I apologize for the long break between installments but internet access here is limited.
So after the first child was born, Melinda and I settled into a average, routine life. I worked and she stayed home and cared for the child. This went on for a couple of years during which time I moved through the ranks of restaurant management obtaining a position of a regional manager for a chain covering several locations including Tupelo, West Point and Starkville, MS. My income rose accordingly and I had bought a home in a nice, settled neighborhood and were enjoying some of the nicer things in life. New Years Eve at the Peabody in Memphis, a week in the NC mountains, birthday parties for Z with 100 people complete with train rides for the kids and character appearances, a new car for Melinda, we were doing well.
Melinda enjoyed this life and adapted well. New clothes always pressed and starched, she never left the house without looking like she had stepped from a band box. I was happy to provide her with this life and although I was rarely home to enjoy it with her, I thought we were happy.
In January 1994, on a Sunday afternoon, I was preparing to go to work when Melinda told me she needed to speak to me. I asked what was wrong and finally she told me "I want out."
When I asked her what she meant, she told me she had been having an affair with our insurance agent, had gotten pregnant and was leaving to be with him. I learned later that the two of them had planned to both tell their spouses on Friday night and while he had told his wife and left the house, Melinda had gotten cold feet and waited until she could wait no more. She would later tell me that it was because she really didn't want to leave but I suspect it was more about the money and life she would be leaving than anything else.
Just a little fact I found quite telling later, after they had planned to drop the bomb that Friday evening, Paul came by early that month to collect his payment from me so he could collect it before Melinda left me that month. LOL
Anyway, she left. She packed a suitcase and went to live with her sister in Alabama. The child stayed with me and a couple of weeks later she signed full custody of him over to me.
Apparently things didn't go for she and her insurance agent as they thought they would. His wife raised all kinds of hell and promised him he would leave with nothing and made good on her promise. Before long, Melinda found herself living in a cheap apartment in Tupelo with no car and having to go back to work. Her insurance agent, Paul Flatt, was living with his parents and they were not happy with the whole situation as I understood it. Their son leaving his wife and young son for Melinda was not something these social climbers approved of.
After 4 months of living this way, Melinda wanted to come back home. I couldn't believe it but she did! Being stupid as I was and feeling like Z needed both parents, I agreed to it and she moved back. All seemed well for a couple of weeks until one day while I was at work I was served with papers. Melinda was suing me!
I suppose Melinda looked around these weeks later and didn't like the life she saw for herself so she and her boyfriend decided to hire an attorney and try to sue me for my house, custody of Z and anything else she could get her hands on. She had come home to make a list of everything she could to make sure nothing was missed and while I was at work, she took Z and had the lawyer serve me. The lawyer was a friend of Paul Flatt's, her boyfriend the insurance agent, so they were all in on it. Can you say greed? He would send his pregnant girlfriend back to live, and sleep, with me for weeks just to get his hands on my things? And what kind of woman would agree to this?
Looking back, I should have known this would be her method of operation going forward but I ignored it.
What Melinda and Paul didn't know was that I had been talking to an agent about selling the house and selling was already in the works. I knew that we wouldn't be able to live in Tupelo anymore with all the crap that had gone on. Since this was already done, all I had to do was call the agent and sell and I did. Within a couple of weeks I had closed on the house and had the yard sale to end yard sales, selling everything I owned. Boat, appliances, everything. Why not, she had taken the child I had raised since he was born. The child I had watched take his first breath and without him or her, I had no reason to stay. She could have whatever was left that she could get.
I was a week from leaving town when I got the call from Melinda, she was staying in a safe house there in Tupelo. Apparently the attorney had gotten her in by saying she was in danger from me and hid her there while they were trying to sue me. Anyway, she had found out everything was gone I guess and wanted to come back home. Can you believe it? Can you believe I was once again, dumb enough to let her?
This story is longer than I realized.......
She came back. We moved into her apartment. She quit her job. All seemed well. I paid for her baby to be born and we moved to Memphis where I started another job. A new life.......for a while.
Showing posts with label Tillman Self. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tillman Self. Show all posts
Friday, July 23, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
We Met
To truly understand this story it is nessessary that you know some details relating to how things started between my ex and myself. You have to know the background on this woman who is so selfish and greedy that she will use everyone and everything at her disposal to destroy the only person who has ever cared for her and taken care of her. She didn't just start playing the victim. She has just perfected it.
I met my ex, Melinda, in the spring of 1990. We were both managers of a fast food chain in Tupelo, MS, I, a manager of one store. She, an assistant manager of another. I was 28, she 21.
Melinda had been married for about 6 months to a guy who was another manager within the company but was not happy for various reasons. We talked quite a bit and she let me know she was interested in me and the feeling was mutual. Before long, her husband left her as he was also dissatisfied with the marriage. I was away on a manager's retreat when she went home to find an empty apartment. All he had left her was a twin bed and her clothes. She called me crying wanting to know what she would do.
I returned home a few days later and Melinda moved into my apartment. We lived together for a couple of months and I thought we were happy. I gladly did all the cooking, cleaning, washing clothes and other domestic duties as well as work 60+ hours a week. Hey, I was in love (or lust) and the relationship was new. You know how it is. Then one night, she just didn't come home. I drove around all night worried about where she was and what had happened to her. Remember, there weren't cell phones in those days so if no one answered the land line you were out of luck. When I finally got in touch with her, she said she wanted to end our relationship and didn't know how to do it. This would start a pattern that would repete itself in the coming years but at the time, I just didn't know.
Several weeks went by and I went on with my life. Don't get me wrong, I cared for Melinda and tried to get her back with the standard fare of flowers, cards and anything else I could think of but when it became obvious she was seeing others, I gave it up.
Then in October, Melinda called me to tell me her sister had just had her baby and wanted to know if I wanted to drive down to Alabama and see it. I said yes because I liked her sister and of course wanted to see the baby. When I got there, Melinda seemed upset about something but I didn't know what. Later she said she wanted to talk so we went to the mall and talked. She talked about us getting back together and how she missed me and I shared that I had missed her, too.
Once we got back to Tupelo, Melinda told me she was pregnant and didn't know who the father was. I was shocked that in just a couple of months she had been with enough partners that she didn't even know who fathered her baby but that appeared to be the case. She said she thought the father was a 17 year old she had been out with but couldn't be sure and didn't even know his name. She was at a loss about what to do. She didn't want to have an abortion because she had already lost custody of one child to her 1st husband when she was a teenager and had already had one abortion a couple of years prior with her last husband. She wanted to keep this baby.
I told Melinda I still cared for her and if she wanted, I would claim the child and take care of her and the baby. She seemed happy about that and immediately moved back in with me and quit her job. This was the last job Melinda would have as long as we were together.
As I only had a 1 bedroom apartment, we knew we would need something larger so we found a townhouse that was really more than I could afford but what the heck, it made her happy so we moved in and in July of 1991, Z was born.
More to come.......
I met my ex, Melinda, in the spring of 1990. We were both managers of a fast food chain in Tupelo, MS, I, a manager of one store. She, an assistant manager of another. I was 28, she 21.
Melinda had been married for about 6 months to a guy who was another manager within the company but was not happy for various reasons. We talked quite a bit and she let me know she was interested in me and the feeling was mutual. Before long, her husband left her as he was also dissatisfied with the marriage. I was away on a manager's retreat when she went home to find an empty apartment. All he had left her was a twin bed and her clothes. She called me crying wanting to know what she would do.
I returned home a few days later and Melinda moved into my apartment. We lived together for a couple of months and I thought we were happy. I gladly did all the cooking, cleaning, washing clothes and other domestic duties as well as work 60+ hours a week. Hey, I was in love (or lust) and the relationship was new. You know how it is. Then one night, she just didn't come home. I drove around all night worried about where she was and what had happened to her. Remember, there weren't cell phones in those days so if no one answered the land line you were out of luck. When I finally got in touch with her, she said she wanted to end our relationship and didn't know how to do it. This would start a pattern that would repete itself in the coming years but at the time, I just didn't know.
Several weeks went by and I went on with my life. Don't get me wrong, I cared for Melinda and tried to get her back with the standard fare of flowers, cards and anything else I could think of but when it became obvious she was seeing others, I gave it up.
Then in October, Melinda called me to tell me her sister had just had her baby and wanted to know if I wanted to drive down to Alabama and see it. I said yes because I liked her sister and of course wanted to see the baby. When I got there, Melinda seemed upset about something but I didn't know what. Later she said she wanted to talk so we went to the mall and talked. She talked about us getting back together and how she missed me and I shared that I had missed her, too.
Once we got back to Tupelo, Melinda told me she was pregnant and didn't know who the father was. I was shocked that in just a couple of months she had been with enough partners that she didn't even know who fathered her baby but that appeared to be the case. She said she thought the father was a 17 year old she had been out with but couldn't be sure and didn't even know his name. She was at a loss about what to do. She didn't want to have an abortion because she had already lost custody of one child to her 1st husband when she was a teenager and had already had one abortion a couple of years prior with her last husband. She wanted to keep this baby.
I told Melinda I still cared for her and if she wanted, I would claim the child and take care of her and the baby. She seemed happy about that and immediately moved back in with me and quit her job. This was the last job Melinda would have as long as we were together.
As I only had a 1 bedroom apartment, we knew we would need something larger so we found a townhouse that was really more than I could afford but what the heck, it made her happy so we moved in and in July of 1991, Z was born.
More to come.......
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
The Beginning
This is a long story and it will take some time to tell. I don't expect this blog to help me in my current case, far from that I expect this blog to cost me given the size of the ego I am dealing with.
How dare anyone question the actions of the great and powerful Tillman Self!
I simply want everyone to know who they might have to deal with some day if they are unfortunate enough to find themselves in front of his bench. I have been collecting stories from others who have also been unfortunate enough to suffer due to his bigotry and disregard for the law. If you have a story to tell, you can send it to me at AbusedByJudgeSelf@Hotmail.com. No names are needed, just the story.
Maybe by doing this, enough people will care about having a judge who is truly fair and Tillman Self can be replaced by one who is.
How dare anyone question the actions of the great and powerful Tillman Self!
I simply want everyone to know who they might have to deal with some day if they are unfortunate enough to find themselves in front of his bench. I have been collecting stories from others who have also been unfortunate enough to suffer due to his bigotry and disregard for the law. If you have a story to tell, you can send it to me at AbusedByJudgeSelf@Hotmail.com. No names are needed, just the story.
Maybe by doing this, enough people will care about having a judge who is truly fair and Tillman Self can be replaced by one who is.
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